James Pleiades Hawkins!! (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rattlingthestars) wrote2017-02-07 12:46 am
rattlingthestars) wrote2017-02-07 12:46 am
IC Inbox II
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'S Jim. Leave a message.
previous inbox
'S Jim. Leave a message.
[ Jim looks at Zell's hand when it touches him and the gentleness makes the fight drain out of him, leaving only exhaustion left in him. ]
I'll try. I just.
[ He huffs again and shakes his head. ]
You're the best thing I've got, and I don't want to screw it up. Don't want to hurt you.
I'll try. I just.
[ He huffs again and shakes his head. ]
You're the best thing I've got, and I don't want to screw it up. Don't want to hurt you.
I thought -
[ Jim's a little close to tears, now, or at least sounding pretty choked up from where he's buried in Zell's shoulder. ]
You didn't remember for like. Fifteen years. But you remember now?
[ Jim's a little close to tears, now, or at least sounding pretty choked up from where he's buried in Zell's shoulder. ]
You didn't remember for like. Fifteen years. But you remember now?
This place likes messing with us.
[ Screw this place tbh. But he's not letting it damper the current mood. Latching on to this perfect moment where everything is good. ]
I remember now. Want me to prove it?
[ Brushing the pad of his thumb under Jim's eyes carefully. ]
[ Screw this place tbh. But he's not letting it damper the current mood. Latching on to this perfect moment where everything is good. ]
I remember now. Want me to prove it?
[ Brushing the pad of his thumb under Jim's eyes carefully. ]
[ Eventually, Jim comes back to himself. It's a struggle and he has to fight it every inch, but eventually there's a deep breath that's not followed by a sob. Eventually he can think again.
He reaches blindly for his bag and pulls a water bottle out by feel so that he can take a quick drink and then offer it wordlessly to Zell. ]
He reaches blindly for his bag and pulls a water bottle out by feel so that he can take a quick drink and then offer it wordlessly to Zell. ]
[ He takes the bottle and carefully drinks without changing their positions. It helps feeling something solid against him. Offering it back as he bumps his forehead against Jim's shoulder. ]
We should. [ Breathing in deeply. ] Come up with a plan. Figure out how the hell to get into the school.
[ Keep busy and make sure that the others won't have that to worry about when they come back. ]
We should. [ Breathing in deeply. ] Come up with a plan. Figure out how the hell to get into the school.
[ Keep busy and make sure that the others won't have that to worry about when they come back. ]
[ The best thing I've got. He knows he's heard Jim say this before, but it always hits straight to his heart when he says it again. Tracing the scar there on his knees as he feels himself calm down. ]
We're partners. If something goes wrong for either of us the other will be there to have their back. Even if that means letting them leave when they need it.
[ Offering his hand to Jim. ]
Sorry about worrying you. Also trying to break out of the house after lock down.
We're partners. If something goes wrong for either of us the other will be there to have their back. Even if that means letting them leave when they need it.
[ Offering his hand to Jim. ]
Sorry about worrying you. Also trying to break out of the house after lock down.
[ Jim meets his eyes, studying them for a moment, before smiling and dipping his head. ]
I believe you.
[ He does, honestly, there's no way Zell could look at him like that if they were strangers. Doesn't stop him from taking a little advantage of the situation, though. ]
But... Tell me something only you'd know.
I believe you.
[ He does, honestly, there's no way Zell could look at him like that if they were strangers. Doesn't stop him from taking a little advantage of the situation, though. ]
But... Tell me something only you'd know.
Got two tents. That should make exploring easier.
[ Jim regrets it as soon as he's saying it, but he can't actually stop himself. He huffs and takes another drink from the bottle. ]
-Sorry. Uh. Okay. A plan.
[ Jim regrets it as soon as he's saying it, but he can't actually stop himself. He huffs and takes another drink from the bottle. ]
-Sorry. Uh. Okay. A plan.
[ Jim takes it and holds it in his lap, squeezes tight, and huffs. ]
You were freaking out. I get it. So was I.
[ When he left. ]
Won't do it again without telling you.
You were freaking out. I get it. So was I.
[ When he left. ]
Won't do it again without telling you.
[ That look that Jim is his world? Or the look of fondly recalling some moments. Putting a hand over a knee as he looks down. ]
Can tell you how you got your scars.
[ Leaning in to kiss his bangs. ]
There's also building a blanket fort in the toy store. Or our first time in the tub at the Inn.
Can tell you how you got your scars.
[ Leaning in to kiss his bangs. ]
There's also building a blanket fort in the toy store. Or our first time in the tub at the Inn.
[ Returning the squeeze. They both kind of panicked. This place really does mess with them. ]
Thanks, Stars.
[ Leaning forward to be closer to him. ]
How about I make it up to you?
Thanks, Stars.
[ Leaning forward to be closer to him. ]
How about I make it up to you?
[ Jim will gain a quick peck on the cheek for that. ]
[ Wincing and then he just adjusts his arms around Jim to give him a squeeze. ]
Yeah. Yeah we do.
[ Making a sound and then he tries to focus again on what to do. ]
Have to find a way into the high school.
[ Then this whole losing them again will mean something. ]
Yeah. Yeah we do.
[ Making a sound and then he tries to focus again on what to do. ]
Have to find a way into the high school.
[ Then this whole losing them again will mean something. ]
[ Jim flushes. He hadn't told Zell about any of that, even in the fifteen years between.
He rests his hand over Zell's and closes his eyes. ]
Really glad you're back, Sunshine.
He rests his hand over Zell's and closes his eyes. ]
Really glad you're back, Sunshine.
[ Has he ever said how much he loves that he can make Jim flush? Ducking down to kiss the corner of his mouth. ]
I'm glad to be back. Man, I'm tired of this place finding ways to hurt you.
[ He needs to go fight a binch or something.
Huffing out a loud breath and then he's just going to lean against Jim. It's nice to be able to touch him or be this close without the edge of not remembering. ]
I'm glad to be back. Man, I'm tired of this place finding ways to hurt you.
[ He needs to go fight a binch or something.
Huffing out a loud breath and then he's just going to lean against Jim. It's nice to be able to touch him or be this close without the edge of not remembering. ]
You don't have to.
[ Jim leans forward too, resting their foreheads together. ]
Just stay here for a while?
[ Jim leans forward too, resting their foreheads together. ]
Just stay here for a while?
Sorry.
[ Jim repeats himself at the wince and then rubs his face. ]
Apparently the front door's not going to cut it. Think there's a better way underground?
[ Jim repeats himself at the wince and then rubs his face. ]
Apparently the front door's not going to cut it. Think there's a better way underground?
[ Brushing his knuckles against the side of Jim's face. ]
Yeah we can. However long it takes.
[ Smiling as he moves his hand through Jim's hair. Just going to stroke him for as long as they stay like that.
Or until their remaining clothes become too uncomfy in the water. ]
Yeah we can. However long it takes.
[ Smiling as he moves his hand through Jim's hair. Just going to stroke him for as long as they stay like that.
Or until their remaining clothes become too uncomfy in the water. ]
Me?
[ Jim buries his nose in Zell's jaw and kisses just under his ear. ]
You're the one that died, Sunshine. And... everything else.
[ Jim buries his nose in Zell's jaw and kisses just under his ear. ]
You're the one that died, Sunshine. And... everything else.
[ He wants to reassure him it's okay, and that it'll be okay, but it's not. He knows it's not. Shifting his hand up to rest over Jim's heart as he sighs. ]
Yeah, there could be. [ Tapping lightly to match the beat of his heart. ]
We can check in a direction before heading back to the tunnels to see?
[ Maybe they missed something. ]
Yeah, there could be. [ Tapping lightly to match the beat of his heart. ]
We can check in a direction before heading back to the tunnels to see?
[ Maybe they missed something. ]
[ Sighing contently as that as he tilts his head away to give Jim more access. ]
Yeah. Yeah, I know. But I didn't remember, Stars.
[ And it's crappy. He doesn't regret his choice, and he knows that Jim had people there with him to catch him. It still...
Remembering all the times they lost people and thinking of Jim being hurt or upset... It hurts like a punch to the gut. ]
I left you. Not just dying, but my memories were gone.
Yeah. Yeah, I know. But I didn't remember, Stars.
[ And it's crappy. He doesn't regret his choice, and he knows that Jim had people there with him to catch him. It still...
Remembering all the times they lost people and thinking of Jim being hurt or upset... It hurts like a punch to the gut. ]
I left you. Not just dying, but my memories were gone.
I stayed away.
[ In the future. The one that's not going to happen now, because Jim's not going to let it. He'd been an idiot. ]
I couldn't handle it. Not having this.
[ In the future. The one that's not going to happen now, because Jim's not going to let it. He'd been an idiot. ]
I couldn't handle it. Not having this.
I sure as hell didn't make it easier for you.
[ Nuzzling against Jim's ear. ]
I stayed away, too. You were hurting. I could see it when you didn't find what you were searching for. I could see how much I let you down.
[ It felt bad, wrong, and just sad. ]
[ Nuzzling against Jim's ear. ]
I stayed away, too. You were hurting. I could see it when you didn't find what you were searching for. I could see how much I let you down.
[ It felt bad, wrong, and just sad. ]
Sure. We'll pick a direction in the morning.
[ The tapping reminds Jim of the stethoscope, the memory of it so strong that for a moment he feels like he can't see until he snaps back to himself.
Breathing. He can do breathing. Or - ]
That offer to spar still on the table?
[ The tapping reminds Jim of the stethoscope, the memory of it so strong that for a moment he feels like he can't see until he snaps back to himself.
Breathing. He can do breathing. Or - ]
That offer to spar still on the table?
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